My 1st grader may or may not have writer’s block. He may or may not have handwriting issues. He may or may not be stubborn as a mule. He may or may not be a task avoider. All these things may be true, but he needs to write in school, at homework time, for pleasure.

My 1st grader has handwriting that is all over the place. I found lined paper for him with ridged rules to keep his writing within the lines. He knows what he wants to say, writes it, but without the ridged rules his writing can be hard to decipher. Once he uses the ridged rule paper, his writing in the composition book is SO much better. Here’s a link to purchase a set of Mead Writing Notebooks. My son rocked the notebook with the raised rules. He learned quickly to write within the lines. I also found paper where the child writes each letter in a box. I will move on to this paper mid-summer.

My 11-year-old is a different matter. I am thinking of starting a private blog for her. I will have her use it as a journal. I might add writing prompts, but may see how she does with it on her own. One thing is for sure, she loves to type! Update: She starter her own blog and she is writing a play!

This has been the loooonnngggeest school year ev-er. Thanks to Howrd County NOT filing for waiver snow days our kids are in school the longest in Maryland. Summer will be sweet, but the new school year will come all too soon.

Of course, this summer as last we have projects to work on. Workbooks to do. Math facts to learn. Books to read.

The kids are not copmplaining about the long school year. Thankfully all three love school. SO why am I compaining?

I have a hard time with change. I like to get a set of dates and stick to them. Don’t like change. Although I have to say that each school year, the last day of school is changed due to snow days. I should be used to it by now.

I have blogged extensively about my passion for keeping kids safe online.

When I first went online I was a married 20-something. The extent of my online life was checking e-mail once a month — I had very few friends who had e-mail accounts back then. Come to think of it the internet was a nicer place back then. Very little spam. I kind of remember single digit e-mails in my in-box. Can you imagine! Viruses became more of an issue as e-mail entered the workplace.

I don’t know when I first heard about online predators targeting young children, but I am sure I was shocked to the core. No amount of training can prepare you for the shock and outrage of crimes against children, tweens, and teens.

I was thrilled to be invited to the Cox 5th National Teen Summit on Internet & Wireless Safety in Washington, D.C. I was anxious to hear what the teens had to say about online safety. My daughter is a young teen. As the oldest grandchild on both sides of the family, she is a trailblazer. Anything she does whether academic or artistic or online is subject to scrutiny. We want to give her the tools necessary to do everything safely.

The teens were inspiring. The teens told how they help the teens and tweens in their community navigate the internet, Facebook, cell phone use, sexting, and many other issues. The teens were emceed by the awe-inspiring John Walsh. Questions from twitter were handled by @KeyInfluencer AKA James Andrews. Andrews asked the teens probing questions. Walsh challenged the teens to give precise, fact-filled answers. Many of the teens head up groups dedicated to teaching online safety in their high schools or at boys and girls clubs.

The Cox Teen Summit covered many topics. I took copious notes. There was one main theme brought up throughout the summit. Schools need to teach kids about online safety as part of the curriculum.

Cell Phones

• Sexting is still a big problem for tweens. Teens see younger kids as having too much freedom with cell phones.
• Walsh urged that kids as who walk to and from school or take a bus need a cell phone — even if they are as young as 7-8. He cited a couple of recent abductions where kids who walk/take the bus to school were stalked. Could have used phone to call for help.
• Walsh said if Mom/Dad were worried about cell phone abuse by younger kids Mom/Dad could block all calls except emergency or calls to Mom/Dad.
• Teens suggested prepaid cell phones.
• Walsh “Texting is the crack of teens.”
• Walsh, Andrews, and teens love Oprah’s Texting Ban. Have you signed the pledge?
• Fact: Texting while driving causes more accidents than drunk driving.
• What’s on the horizon for online/wireless technology? Video chat on phones.

Internet and Social Networks

• Do a Google Alert for your kids to find out what they are doing online.
• Start and continue a dialogue with your kids about what they are doing online.
• Most of the teens have friended their parents.
• All of the teens had taught a family member how to use Facebook.
• Teens talked of learning what to post and what not to post on their walls.
• Andrews told teens “to think about what they are putting up on the internet.”
• Teens talked about how everything they post online could be viewed by college admissions and potential employers.
• Teens asserted that “Privacy is a Privilege.”
• Walsh: “It is time for parents to parent up and find out what their kids are doing on the internet.”
• Parents, teachers, and kids need to learn Facebook privacy settings, so that they know how much of their profile is available for review.
• Walsh ” Teens and tweens give up too much information about themselves.” Bad characters are out there waiting to find vulnerable teens and tweens.
• Teens asked “How much is too much information?”
• Everyone hates ChatRoulette — lots of “creepy guys” per Walsh — and Formspring.

Schools

• There should be a policy of anonymity in schools so that students can report bullying without fear of retribution.
• Walsh said that America’s Most Wanted doesn’t trace or tap calls. People can call in without “fear of getting in trouble.”
• Teens said there should be safe rooms at school where kids can go for help.
• Cyber bullying and regular bullying are very different. Many school counselors are not trained to deal with cyberbullying.
• Kids need to be taught how to use social networks.
• At one time it was an option for kids to be on Facebook, now it is a given that most teens will be online in social networking sites.
• Teens need to be taught rules for online behavior.

Identity Theft

• Teens talked of experiences with identity theft. One teen said that a relative had tried to steal her identity online.
• Walsh said that identity theft is big business with kids lured to buy a “free download” with Mom and Dad’s credit card. Kids don’t realize they are being duped.
• Walsh told of unscrupulous census takers who go from house to house gathering information about inhabitants.

Families and Online Safety

• Families need to work together to come up with a set of rules for their children.
• Andrews says tweak rules as necessary.
• Walsh “Kids and teens want rules and boundaries.”
• Parents should go over boundaries with kids. Discuss consequences and punishments.
• Parents should not assume that teens understand the rules. Go over rules to make sure kids understand.

Walsh made a statement that stuck with me. He spoke of the kids who are neglected and abandoned by their parents. He praised the work of the Boys and Girls Clubs in finding these kids and giving them something to live for…education, camaraderie, hope.

Walsh urged the teens at the summit and the teens at home:

If you see something bad happening, say something. You will save someone’s life.

The teens reminded everyone that they are a “strong force.”

My children are still in school, but today all three might as well not be. Today is Convergence Day. One of those days when all three children have a scheduled activity for school requiring my help.

The 1st grader has his end-of-the-year picnic. I’m running a few games. My husband is joining him and bringing lunch. I would stay for lunch, but I have to go to a state park over an hour away. Why?

I have to go to a state park as the 8th grader has HER end-of-the-year picnic at Greenbrier State Park. She’s riding the school bus to the park, but wants to stay later to swim. I initially said that she had to ride the bus back to school, to get the bus home, but she desperately wants to stay at the park, So…I have arranged my day so that she can stay. Nice mom, right?

But, what about my 6th grader? She has her end-of-the-year picnic as well. What to do about this? I knew I couldn’t chaperone due to the 1st grade picnic. The school did not need chaperones.  I’m thankful for small mercies. I will try to do a fly by before driving to the state park with the 8th grader.

Convergence Day is given with three children in two different schools. Why don’t the schools coordinate their calendars?

I wrote about our homework struggles. While most of the country’s kids are skipping out of school, our county’s kids are “still going and going” — like the Energizer Bunny. I complained about how much time we spend at volleyball tournaments. I even wrote letters to my kids. The post I need to write is about our summer plans. So here goes…

Nine years ago we joined a swim club. Back then I had a 2-month-old, a 4-year-old, and a 7-year-old. When our name came to top of the waitlist I strongly argued to my husband that we NEEDED to join the swim club. He was very much opposed as our children were young and taking all three children swimming was a two-person job.

I prevailed. We joined the club. Even my husband agrees that it was the best decision. The year after joining the swim club, the older two kids jumped in to the swim team. Best decision #2. Our summers for the last eight years have been dominated by the swim team…in a good way.

Our mornings are all about swim practice. Our afternoons are a little more unpredictable. Some days we stay at the pool — my youngest loves this. Some days we stay at home — my oldest loves this. Some days we go on a excursion — kids’ excitement level varies! But, what do we do with the time when we are at home.

The kids would love to be plugged in all day long. Quite honestly some days I am plugged in all day long. So, I have prepared a plan…

The Musings from Me family plan for “use of anything with a plug.”

• Following on from the school year, there will be no TV before breakfast and swim practice on weekdays. On weekends, TV can be watched in the mornings.
• Once swim practice is over, kids will play outside or inside.
• If inside kids will ask permission for screen time only after summer workbook pages and reading have been completed.
• Chores need to be done before screentime or “use of anything with a plug.”
• In the evenings, kids can watch TV if we are watching as a family.
• If kids want to go online, permission will be needed from a parent.

Online use in our house could be PBS Kids, Webkinz, or Yoursphere. I find all three sites to be a safe place for my kid, my tween, and my teen. Yoursphere is a site that my teen used extensively during the school year. My tween is very involved on Yoursphere…playing games…racking up points…starting spheres or groups…and having a good time. My youngest is asking to join. I think I might sign him up this weekend.

Speaking of signing up for Yoursphere… Yoursphere is now FREE! Yay FREE!. Kids, tweens, and teens can sign up. Moms and dads when you are signing up your kids, be sure to use Code YSMC-0051.

Yoursphere has an exciting incentive for Musings from Me readers tied to my referral code! Anyone who uses Code YSMC-0051 to register on Yoursphere.com will be entered into a weekly drawing to win a $50 gift card. The Yoursphere Test Drive Mom with the most referrals above 200 will win a $1000 American Express gift card!

So, you can sign up for Yoursphere for FREE using Code: YSMC-0051 and we will both be entered in to a drawing for a gift card. Thanks for helping me have a chance to win the gift card!

I wrote this review while participating in the Yoursphere Test Drive program by Mom Central on behalf of Yoursphere. I received a free lifetime Gold membership on Yoursphere.com, Yoursphere t-shirts, and a $50 American Express gift card to facilitate my review.

Fast forward to 2010… Homework is a nightmare… not becoming a nightmare…not progressing to nightmare status. No…homework for three children is a full-blown nightmare. I’ll break it down for you. Two middle schoolers with homework every night of the weekend including weekends. Two middle schoolers who play travel volleyball, which means each girl must juggle homework with volleyball practice and all day tournaments. One middle schooler who swims 3 nights a week with a swim meet once a month. Throw in clarinet practice to add to the fun.

During the school year both are super busy. My job is to keep track of what homework is due (in the kids’ defense the older two know what assignments are due), give them a quiet place to do the homework, and follow up with them and their teachers if needed once grades come out.

Now, I am not just talking about homework, but also about the book reports, long essays, poster projects, movies, and any other thing a teacher flings at them.

And then there is my cherubic 1st grader. This child is turning my already gray hair white. Seriously! The tantrums. The tirades. The pouting. And that’s just me. The school year has been a struggle. I believe that I could have recorded the following sentences for use during homework time — I say these phrases MANY times during homework:

• Find your backpack.
• Take out your composition book, agenda book, and poetry journal.
• Get a pencil.
• Your pencil is sharp enough. Don’t sharpen another one.
• Why are you out of your seat? You need to work on homework.
• 3-4 sentences means 3-4 sentences!
• You can have one sentence that says: “I like [fill in name of favorite action hero].”
• I can’t read what that says. Erase and rewrite.
• We will sit here all night.

And lest you think I am a complete Negative Nelly, I constantly praise him. Frequently compliment him on sentence choice. Tell him he used a great word in his writing…a $5 word!

As the school year winds down I am struck by how far each child has come this year. Good progress in some areas. Amazing progress in other areas. Gains made in math for both. A confidence boost in reading for one. The oldest is now writing college-level essays. The middle is now more confident speaking in public. The youngest who struggled all year with writing ANYTHING wrote a 45-word poem for last night’s homework. 45 words I am still reeling and very proud!

What does homework look like in your house? Do your kids get their homework done independently? Are you a drill sergeant?

Education is important in our house. While it is true that my parents were quite hands off about my education, I picked up the education vibe from their actions. My father left school at 16 to become a draftsman. After working and going to school at night for 7 years, he received his bachelor’s degree. He may not have said very much about this to me as a child, but his tenacity left an impression. My mother received her degree when I was a teen. I always knew I was going to college.

For some kids college is just not an option. I am saddened by this. I try to do what I can to help other children by donating to collections at church, sorting through our books to donate, or making a donation to a charity. I am limited by what I can give. We are a one-income family with a little extra income from my blogging pursuits.

My children are fortunate that while we are not wealthy by any means, we live in a good school district, regularly shop for books online/bookstores, check out books form the library, or participate in enrichment activities. I wanted to help kids in a classroom less “privileged” than my own children’s classrooms.

When I was offered the chance to make a donation to the Bing Education Program, I leaped at the chance to help other children. I participated in Bing Teacher Appreciation Website Blog and Twitter Tour. I was given a $100 DonorsChoose.org giving code to use toward the classroom projects of my choice. I can tell you that I am rarely, if ever, able to give this much to charity. Perhaps in the future I will be able to give more. I hope so.

• I was eager to find out about the projects available. I logged on to the Discover Bing Education site.
• Clicked on the “Making a Differnce through DonorsChoose.org.”
• Selected “Projects.”
• Scrolled through the list of available projects. Spotted one about books. Noticed the project was close to meeting its goal. Looked at several other projects, but returned to the first project as the teacher was looking for a set of leveled readers for her students and my donation could help her meet her goal…almost. Leveled readers are so important so that kids make steady progress and gain confidence in their reading skills.
• Without hesitation, I clicked on the added the project to my account, proceeded to checkout, and paid my donation using my DonorsChoose.org code. You can pay by credit card, amazon, PayPal, or check, as well.

Within minutes of checking out and receiving a confirmation of my order, I received a sweet e-mail from the teacher I helped. Loved it!

The Bing’s Teacher Appreciation Website helps teachers help themselves. Here’s how it works:

• a teacher can log onto the DonorsChoose.org website to start a “classroom project” or donation request.
• Parents and students can then visit the Bing Teacher Appreciation site to leave a comment [up to 5 per visitor] about a teacher who has made a difference in their life, enabling them to receive a $5 giving code to donorschoose.org [one per comment].
• Parents and students can then apply the $5 giving code to the “classroom project” of their choice.
• Classroom projects are created by teachers, so reach out to your childrens’ teachers and encourage them to submit their own projects!

Do you have a teacher who has made a difference in your child’s life or your life? Add the teacher’s name to the Bing site!

I wrote this review while participating in a blog tour campaign by Mom Central on behalf of Bing and a $100 DonoseChoose.org giving code to facilitate my review. Mom Central also sent me a thank-you gift certificate.”

BABW furry friends make the perfect toy for all ages. My little guy clutched his Elmo by the ear when he was not quite 2. My tween favors any of the glam and glitzy BABWs. My teen has various creatures in her bed — shhhh don’t tell her I said this!

BABWs make a great gift for special occasions. My daughters were 7 and 4 when our son was born. I knew both girls would immediately fall in love with their baby brother. I never worried about jealousy. I wanted to buy each of my daughters a gift before the baby arrived. I wanted to make the arrival of a new baby in our family a special one.

I liked the idea of all four of us going to BABW on our last outing as a “family-of-four-soon-to-be-five.” I knew that I did not need to buy toys as the baby boy was unlikely to want their Barbie/Disney Princess/girlie toys. I just wanted to give the girls something to commemorate the arrival of their brother to our family.

We have a milestone coming up in our family. Our teen “graduates” from 8th grade. Technically, she will have a transition ceremony. Graduation. Transition. Even graduation from preschool! Whatever you call it. Family milestones are a reason to celebrate.

My friends at BABW told me about a line of furry friends specially designed for spring and summer happenings:

• Graduation — BABW has a selection of cuddly stuffed animals dressed  in items including: a black or white graduation gown, mortar board with tassel, dress clothes, a Class of 2010 sash, and a “Pomp & Circumstance” Sound. The graduation sash or robe can be embroidered with your child’s name for an additional charge of $10.
  
• Father’s Day
• Armed Forces Day — Choose from camo sailor bear, Marine Hero Champ, Air Force curly teddy, Army office teddy, to name a few.
• Wedding and Bridal Shower

I have a special giveaway for Musings from Me readers! I have one $25 BABW Gift Card to giveaway. One comment = one entry. Enter now!

• What was your favorite stuffed animal/toy as a child? Leave a comment.
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I was given a bear as part of my review. The views expressed in the article are my own. The giveaway is open to U.S. residents only. The giveaway ends May 31, 2010, at 11:59 p.m.

I let the tween and teen have some say on their clothes, but the bucks stops with me. My tween and teen can choose their own clothes each day for school and weekend wear. Both know that they have to abide by school dress code rules. Note: School dress code rules are inconsistently enforced…depends on the day and the teacher. Even on their “days off” I monitor how short the skirt or shorts can go. I know, I know, but I don’t want the girls going out in something inappropriate.

When the girls were little, I knew that clothing arguments would be a factor in the future. I enjoyed the days of Osh Kosh, Gap, and Old Navy. Gone are the days when the only choice was color and size. My then little girls had strong opinions on color — pink, purple, or no deal! Now I have to wade through the racks at Justice, Hollister, Areopostale, American Eagle, and abercrombie to find the mom chair.

Although, I do recall a dance performance where my eyes almost bugged out.

Have you seen this CNN clip of the young girls dancing to All the Single Ladies? No? Well, watch it now.

What do you think??

So, were you like me shocked to the core? What was the dance teacher thinking when she chose this dance and those outfits for little girls? Where were the moms? Why did the moms not say “No” to the risque outfits? I know that when my little girls took dance classes, there were times when the costumes were the 9/10/11 year olds seemed a little revealing to me. I recall one year the older girls wore cropped tops and bicycle shorts. These outfits are nothing compared to the bikinis on the girls in the video.

The song? Why pair up such young girls with this song? My little girls danced to the following age-appropriate tunes:

• Be My Little Bumble Bee — white leotard with black appliques.
• Peter Gunn Theme — black leotard with pink appliques — lots of twirling.
• Batman Theme — black leotards with pink bat wings — strobe lights and twirling.

What do you think of clothing for little girls? Leave a comment.

Jessica Gottlieb has an insightful and carefully worded post on this subject.

I remember how excited I was when I got to read the blue airmail letters from my grandmother in England. My family lived in the U.S. — New Jersey to be precise. We returned to England most summers. Staying in contact with my grandmother plus our other relatives was important. Phone calls were prohibitively expensive. Once my English family recorded a message on a cassette tape. We returned the tape to them with a message from our family. I still have that tape.

I want to write a letter to each of my children, so that they know they are loved beyond measure despite the fast, frenetic pace of our family life. In a nod to my blogging and online writing roots, I will write letter on this blog.

I am writing this letter to my children as part of the Baltimore Sun’s Mother’s Day Letters project. Note: For reasons of safety and security, I don’t refer to my children by name on my blog, but rather refer to them as “the teen,” “the preteen,” and the “the kid.”

___

Dear Teen:

You have never been shy about letting me know what you feel.

As a baby you only took a bottle on the 3rd try. You refused to be fed with a spoon to the point where I had to make your oatmeal super thick so that it would stick to your fingers. You insisted on dressing yourself even though putting on pantyhose is impossible for a 2-year-old. You walked out of your preschool classroom because you wanted to go to kindergarten NOW. I could go on, but you get the idea.

Last year when you became a teen, I was secretly worried. You have always been so determined to do what you wanted to do. What would you be like as a teen I wondered?

You emerged in to your teen years as a young lady full of dreams and ambitions for the future. Gone was the petulant and pouty tween. In her place, I found a young woman who was able to have a discussion about an issue even if the outcome was not what you wanted.

You have always done well in school with prodding from us. This past year you have taken the helm with school projects. On a number of occasions you have reminded me of homework assignments!

I am excited about what the future holds for you!

Love, Mommy

___

Dear Preteen:

When you were an infant, I recall that you would scream and fuss at bedtime. I geared up for a battle of wills at bedtime. I fed you and changed you and rocked you — all to no avail. One night it occurred to me to put you in your crib. I stood beside your crib amazed that you fell fast asleep. What?? You let me know in a nonverbal way that you needed an early bedtime. The early bedtime is just one of the gifts you have given this family.

Your sense of humor is a true joy to me. As a child I was a joker…ask Grandma and Grandad! You and I have fun reciting lines from The Simpson’s Movie and Shrek while your Dad, sister, and brother stand by bemused. I know, I know…I laugh at the lines far longer than you do.

As the younger sister to one and the older to another, you have much responsibility. Your older sister can be stand-offish with you or she can be your best buddy — what can I say she’s has an independent streak. Your little brother looks up to you, which I know is both charming and annoying. You handle both of your siblings with grace.

I am thrilled that you have found two sports that you love dearly. While I may not know what a librero does or what your time is in the breaststroke…I love cheering for you on the sidelines or poolside.

I will hang on for the ride to see where life takes you.

Love, Mommy

___

Dear Kid:

You are a bundle of joy wrapped up in a little boy package. You cuddle up for a bear hug or headbutt me — I never know which one I will get! You love your dad and would rather hang out with him. But, from the moment we brought you home from the hospital you have always been my little buddy.

As the only little boy in the family, you are relentless at trying to convert your sisters to the world of Cars and Thomas and Geotrax and Iron Man. You haven’t changed their minds yet, but you never stop trying.

I love that you adore school. From the moment I picked up a book to read to you, your eyes sparkled. Books hold your attention. You love being read to…when persuaded you will read to one of us. I love it when your preteen sister comes in to the room to listen to the Junie B. Jones books Daddy is reading to you. We are a book family!

I am excited to see where life will take you.

Love, Mommy